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Funny Life Quotes to live by
Funny life quotes and sayings are like sugar added to sweeten up lemonade.
Winston Churchill said, "The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees opportunity in every difficulty."
Scroll down to find funny life quotes
Did you know that Encyclopedia Britannica defines life as: "There is no generally accepted definition of life."
So what is life? Up to you to define that.
Here are some funny life quotes by people with humor.
"The only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about." - Oscar Wilde
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made." - Groucho Marx
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life. It goes on."- Groucho Marx
"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense." - Tom Clancy
"Life is like a game of poker: If you don't put any in the pot, there won't be any to take out." - Moms Mabley
"If ignorance is bliss, there should be more happy people." - Victor Cousins
"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights." - Maya Angelou
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Funny life quotes and sayings
by Mark Twain
Mark Twain, was an American author and humorist. His real name was Samuel Langhorne Clemens. He was born on November 30, 1835 and died on April 21, 1910.
As a featured speaker in demand in his time, Twain left a legacy of inspirational quotes, funny life quotes, or just funny quotes. Here are some of his popular sayings.
“It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.”
“I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one”
“The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop”
“Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.”
“All generalizations are false, including this one.”
“The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become”
“To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.”
“When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.”
"When in doubt tell the truth. It will confound your enemies and astound your friends."
"Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside."
"Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits."
"Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference."
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Funny life quotes can be found among Canadian quotes. I did not get this one at first, how about you?
"I saw a notice which said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started." - Brendan Behan
For more quotes on Canada see my friend's website at
http://www.swanparadise.com/Canadian-Quotes.html
Some more funny life quotes and sayings
I do not get enough of funny life quotes or funny quotes about anything. Here are some more:
"There are some things so serious you have to laugh at them." - Niels Bohr
"Nobody really cares if you're miserable, so you might as well be happy." - Cinthia Nelms
"You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself." - Sam Levenson
"It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others." - anonymous
"An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived." - Herbert Samuel
"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it." - Oscar Wilde
"Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years." - George Burns
"No diet will remove all the fat from your body, because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office." - George Bernard Shaw
"I don't suffer from insanity but enjoy every minute of it." - Edgar Allan Poe
"Insanity in individuals is something rare - but in groups, parties, nations, and epochs, it is the rule." - Friedrich Neitzsche
"You can get much further with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone." - Al Capone
"Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac." - George Carlin
"He who laughs last has not yet heard the bad news." - Bertolt Brecht
"Women like silent men. They think they are listening." - Marcel Archard
"A man's got to do what a man's got to do. A woman must do what he can't." - Rhonda Hansome
"Behind every successful man is a surprised woman." - Maryon Pearson.
"Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." - Albert Einstein
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