Art Linkletter: Kids Say The Darndest Things

by Art Linkletter's book
(Kids Say The Darndest Things)

Art Linkletter had the most hilarious interviews with children on his famous show "House Party" on CBS somewhere between the 50's ~ 60's. Here is some kids say the darndest things quotes from Art Linkletter's book:
KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS

What Does Your Daddy Do?

1st kid: "My daddy spreads joy."
Art: To whom?
"To anybody who can pay for it."
I don't understand what kind of a job he has.
"He's a bartender."
I'll bet somebody put you up to this.
"My mother. She's always joking and drinking beer."

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2nd kid: "My father's a school teacher."
Art: That's a fine profession. Does he like it?
"He only has one thing to complain about."
What's that?
"The Kids."

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3rd kid: "My dad's a cop and a bartender. He's sure busy."
Art: How can he do both of those jobs?
"Well, first he gets the people happy and then arrests them."

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4th kid: "My dad's a lawyer."
Art: Does he put people in jail?
"No, he's on the innocent side."
I suppose you want to be a lawyer too.
"No, a cop, so I can put my daddy in jail."
Why would you do a thing like that?
"He spanked me last night."

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5th kid: "My father's a good lawyer."
Art: Just what is a good lawyer?
"He gets bad people out of jail."

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